The Goonies
THE GOONIES (1985)
Imagine being a kid in the 80s before devices and technology hijacked their imaginations. They pretended they were on adventures with their friends following coffee-soaked maps into beautifully scenic sewers on the hunt for a pirate ship with Cyndi Lauper providing a soundtrack.
Well I did anyway.
I’ve seen this film countless times yet I’m always surprised at how it starts on my dvd. A fake suicide leading to a prison break and a high speed police car chase. No one expects that from a child’s film. A quick dip into IMDb Trivia tells me this scene was edited out of the television broadcasts. So I suppose my introduction to this delight was Saturday afternoon TV.
It’s an exhilarating start; introductions are made as the credits roll. The baddies are chased through the streets of Oregon passing our principle heroes along the way foreshadowing what each kid will bring to the table.
The good-hearted dreamer Mikey leads the pack of malcontents with gobshite Mouth, geeky wizkid Data and loveable clutz Chunk. Thankfully followed by his outrageously hunky brother Brand, the hot cheerleader Andy and her smart sarcastic sidekick Stef.
We all wanted to be part of a gang like this as kids; stock archetypes with cool nicknames keen for adventure.
With their homes under threat from local property developers, four friends discover a map with the directions to One Eyed Willy’s bountiful treasure. All they need to do is locate the hidden pirate booty which will surely end their parents’ financial woes and scupper the sale of their neighbourhood. What could possibly go wrong?
Well as rotten luck would have it the map begins exactly where the aforementioned villainous crew of runaway crooks are hiding out. Naturally they want a piece of that delicious pirate pie too. Lead by a frankly frightening Anne Ramsey, this black-clad clan is the stuff of nightmares, not least the menacing opera singing talents of one son.
With a story by Steven Spielberg, screenplay by Chris Columbus (Home Alone) and directed by Richard Donner (Superman), with performances from future Oscar nominees and Emmy winners, it’s no wonder this is a perfect film!
Don’t allow your 2020 adult brain to think too much. You might consider what this ordeal did to poor Chunk (who reminds me of Bette Midler). Can you imagine the therapy he must need after the trauma he endures; corpses suffocating him, bound and tormented by murderous gangsters and then being left in the sole care of a hideous man-baby. And that’s before narrowly escaping a collapsing cave.
It didn’t matter back then.
It’s a wonderful 2 hours of intoxicating escapism where you’re reminded what it’s like to be a young teenager chasing hope.
Down here it’s our time.
Watch this whenever. Morning, afternoon, night.
10 “never say die” thumbs up!
